This past week I had an experience I am really grateful for.
Have you ever felt like you are just too busy because you have to read a million chapters, write a really really challenging article, find people to interview, fill out an application to live in a foreign country, try to understand statistics, and have to come up with a speech to impress a class full of strangers? And when all this weight is on your shoulders, all you want to do is delete anything extra from your life? Like maybe... umm... institute? That is exactly how I felt on Thursday.
I am not proud to admit it, but when I was on the verge of tears from all the building stress, I seriously considered this option. But then I thought again. We had recently had a devotional on the importance of institute and why it is so necessary for young adults... and in this fine devotional there was a mention of receiving "extra" blessing if you attend it regularly. So I thought to myself, "I could really use some extra blessings." I know, I guess I didn't necessarily go for the "right" reasons, but it got me there. And I am so happy it did!
The institute class I am enrolled in is called "Teachings of the Living Prophets". That day in class, we were studying Elder Russell M. Nelson. After learning a couple random fun facts about his life, we got right into the talk he gave last General Conference in November.
I didn't see it coming, but there was a paragraph that hit me really hard. This paragraph gave me the peace I have been looking for the last seven months. After my sweet, loving friend Becky passed away, there wasn't really anything anyone could say to me that gave me a whole comfort in my heart. I knew the things they told me were true, but nothing anyone ever said made me feel at peace with reality.
"The aging process is also a gift from God, as is death. The eventual death of your mortal body is essential to God's great plan of happiness. Why? Because death will allow your spirit to return home to Him. From an eternal perspective, death is only premature for those who are not prepared to meet God."
Nothing in this paragraph is new news to me. I have known these things are true for a long time. But somehow, the way Elder Nelson worded it finally stuck out to me in the way I have been searching for.
Death is a gift. Death does not always come from the aging process, but it is still a gift. Death is essential to God's great plan of happiness. Death will allow your spirit to return home to Him. Death is only premature for those who are not prepared to meet God.
Becky's death seemed premature to every person who knew her and loved her. But, in God's eyes, SHE WAS PREPARED. Even seven months ago, I knew she couldn't have been more prepared to meet God. I wrote:
"There is no doubt Becky Smart made a difference in everyone's lives she touched. She honestly made me feel like a million bucks even when she wasn't around. She was taken from us at such a young age because she had already mastered what few people are ever lucky enough to learn in a full lifetime: how to truly love. I can't think of a better example of this than her. She was always so full of light and love and could change the mood of any setting with her wonderful sense of humor. I hope we can all remember her example and seriously, go tell someone what they mean to you because you never know what could happen! I love you Becky and I couldn't be more grateful to have had you in my life."
She was ready. Even if I wasn't, she was. I didn't think about it this way before, but I am so grateful for the living prophets we have been blessed with today to help me see the light and truth!
I love you Becky Smart. I know this life is just a tiny portion of God's plan, so guess what friend? I will be seeing you soon. <3
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I never got around to posting this picture during Christmas time. This is a scan of a DRAWING my best friend in the whole wide world, Bethypoo Hansen, made for me. Without a doubt, theeeee best present I have ever received. She snuck into my house the night of Christmas Eve and hid this present under the tree without telling anyone. When I ran across it Christmas morning, I was so surprised. No one knew when it had got there, but I went right ahead and opened it, not suspecting what was inside. When I turned the picture frame around, I instantly began to bawl. I never know tears could form so fast, but they streamed down my face as I looked into our perfectly happy faces. This is a picture I will treasure for the rest of my life. These girls on each side of me are two of the closest friends I have ever had. Although we knew each other for almost our entire lives, we never ever had an argument or annoyance with each other (excluding who got the prettiest Barbie Doll...maybe). But seriously, everything in our relationship with each other was perfect, and will be for eternity! I can't wait to be silly and loud in Paradise with you, Becky. Until then, Beth and I will keep your spirit on earth alive reminiscing all the great times we had, and we will continue to make many more as you watch over us safely in your Earthly Father and Heavenly Father's arms!
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